Here’s the thing; love is totally worth it.
In my own view, I feel the word LOVE means so much more than we actually get to experience in our lifetime. Just like the American scientists, William James and Boris Sidis proposed that we humans only get to use about ten percent of our brains, I strongly feel there’s so much to this four letter word that we don’t know of or are yet to fully experience. For most people love can invoke the best of emotions and exhibit the worst of feelings. Sometimes you’re in cloud nine, other times you feel like your guts have been wrenched out. For some, it’s the most beautiful experience ever while for others they really can’t be bothered as it’s yet another word that some silly people fuss about.
Love is inexhaustible.
For this reason, when the word love is mentioned, in my mind’s eye, these three things are bae-before anything else;
1. Love of God:
God Himself is Love. If we are still yet to comprehend all the mysteries of God and His Kingdom, then to a great degree I might be right after all- there’s so much more to love that we would ever get to experience in this lifetime. Loving God is something that should flow naturally, this is really our default setting. I have heard of some atheists who after being converted couldn’t believe the love that exuded from their cold hearts towards God. If only they knew that we as humans were formed this way, to love God and allow ourselves to be loved by Him. One thing we should never forget is the fact that He loved us first. We did not deserve, earn or merit this love. He just did love us first. So, no matter what we do or how much our actions hurt Him, He loves us still unconditionally. Sometimes this kind of loving sounds really crazy to me when I think of all my shortcomings, but this is how it is, God is crazy in love with me and you, no matter what.
2. Love Of Self:
Yasss! Let me indulge myself a bit here. Truth is, in as much as I love hanging out with friends and just generally being a slay mama, I really cannot do without my “me-time”. For fear of sounding like a narcissist, let’s just simply say I dig me. It really pays to know thyself, your strengths, weaknesses, likes, dislikes and love your own company. I’ll be blunt: if you can’t be all alone somewhere and still have a good time, then you just might be the most noise in the company of others. Nobody can give what they don’t have and so if you’re loving who you are, the way you should, then it’s almost impossible not to spread this same love of self to those around you. Take time out to find yourself. Take time to learn how to find and listen to that little voice in you that hardly goes wrong. Take time to know when to use your heart and when to use your head. Take time to know yourself in and out and fall in love with your person remembering that someone else has loved you first and still does, no matter what.
Love Of Others:
This is perhaps the hardest of them all. Sometimes some people make it so difficult to want to extend a token of affection to talk less of loving them. Funny enough now, this could be you! The fact still remains that everyone no matter how stoic and uptight they might seem to be need someone in their corner, their very own person. So, make no mistake about this, everyone is lovable. I took a decision one week; I was going to give a smile to everyone I came in contact with. At the end of the first day, not minding the fact that my jaws hurt a bit from the reflex of my cheeks been drawn back and forth, I felt a bit odd (I mean smiling at people who grunt their good mornings at you can’t be much fun) but decided to go on. By the second week, I realized that everyone who greeted me in the morning did so with a smile on their face! Do unto others what you want them to do to you. In other words, you are the catalyst here as you are the one creating the actions that would determine what you get back. Sometimes this might not always be the case but still no matter how the forest may change, a lion can never give birth to a goat. Someday, somewhere, somehow, you will still get some of the good loving you’ve shared no matter what.
It’s Valentine’s day and the common notion is it’s a “lovers day”. While I agree with this, I implore you to extend your love to others you ordinarily wouldn’t. In as much as you get to buy, receive gifts and spend some quality time with that significant other, remember those who need just as little as a smile or a hug. Remember the less privileged who look to the society for support. Remember that you and I are the society.
SlumFest Lagos Party for children in the slums, Festac Invasion, Dec 2016
PS: Have a sugar-splurge today. Ice-cream, cake, chocolates…trust me, you deserve it.
May your love always count!
Where there is love, there is life- Mahatma Gandhi